Sunday, August 06, 2006

Gone Silent

The phrase "gone silent" is a term used by submariners. It is refers to a time in which the submarine will maintain radio silence so as not to be discovered by a ship that may be above it.

Unfortunately, this is not the meaning I intend.

Since Thursday, I have been punished by my mother because I didn't do my chores.

So that is why I had "gone silent".

Anyway, the winner of TOtB is no one. None of your answers were even close to suitable.

Sorry.

Anyway, new contest:

You are at a party at your neighbor's house and talking to another party-goer who you have deemed a good person and whom you would like to have as a friend.

And you forgot their name.

Stupid.

You break off the conversation by telling the person that the house is on fire and you walk over to a friend and ask the person's name.

They don't know.

Asking around even more, you realize no one knows this person's name. Curious. You decide to get a Coke from the kitchen and walk in, when a smurf pops out from under the sink and pulls you into the cabinet, locking you in. You can't escape, and all the cleaning solvent fumes are going to your head. You can see the kitchen through a tiny crack in the cabinet.

In walks your potential friend whose name you don't know. You yell to them, but they don't hear, they are talking to someone else. You know that if you said their name they would look at you.

You're screwed. Sorry, man.

No wait. I mean, "How do you escape?".

Good luck.

Also to satisfy Carissa, here is a nice happy story about a unicorn.

Once there was a unicorn.

It died.

The end.

8 comments:

Ali said...

good for that.
i'm too lazy to answer.

Jen said...

First, you take one of the cleaning liquids and squirt it out of the tiny little hole. Next, you grab the largest and heaviest object in the cabinet. Then, you whack at the pipes under the sink. Someone will hear it (or if you're lucky enough, the pipe will break and water will spew everywhere), and they will come over to investigate. They will slip on the liquid, making them fall down on the floor where they can hear you better. Then you yell at them for help. You will be rescued. Finally, you take a rather large shovel and hit the person who created smurfs in the first place.

emma said...

sam? can you do an author-description-thing of me? please?

Jeff said...

Obviously the way out is clear. In walks your friend, talking to someone else. You happen to know the other person. You yell to the person you know. "Chuck! Help me out of this cabinet! The cleaning solutions are suffocating me!" Chuck turns to the potential friend and says "Claire! (the potential friend's name) Help Jeff out of the cabinet! He'll die if we don't!" You have now found out Claire's name and have two people breaking open the door, or attempting to, at least. Suddenly, the smurf appears with several large machine guns from behind Chuck and Claire. With a few rounds, both Chuck and Claire are down. The bullets, however, happened to hit the lock on the cabinet door, letting you free! Dodging the bullets to your best attempt, you roll out of the cabinet towards the smurf. As you attempt to rid yourself of the evildoer (by stepping on it) you get hit in the arm and leg with the bullets raining from the smurf's dual machine guns. While you scream in pain, the smurf sees you falling from the attack and decides to activate its emergency last-attack system, namely, a suicide bomb. The smurf explodes, and the force of the explosion rockets you threw the wall into the party room. You are fatally wounded from the gunshots and the explosion, but your friends at the party call the ambulance anyway. As the ambulance walks through the door, you cease to be. A few moments later, you wake up, finding yourself in a dark corner of hell. As your eyes adjust to the bright flames that surround you, you find yourself next to that smurf. A few yards away, however, sits the potential friend Claire. She mentions Chuck, whom she died with, was sent to heaven on account of a vaccancy. And thus, you have found out the potential friend's name and have an eternity to be their friend.

Jen said...

Guess what, Sam? I'm at camp!!! I'm talking to you from camp. So cool.

Right now the teacher is trying to log on to his computer and he said we could browse the internet while he figures it out.

Leah said...

I scream loudly "I am the magical cabinet of the kitchen! Defeat this smurf and you shall have 3 wishes." The two people notice me since everyone notices things for their personal gain. Potenial friend turns into the Hulk and rips out the garbage compacter, then swings it onto the smurf's head. The smurf faints from the sheer awesomeness of the Hulk. I tumble out of the cabinet. The person I know walks out in a huff because there's no possible way I could grant wishes. The Hulk forgets about in the process of running through the wall. I should now know the potential friend's name is Bruce Banner because he is the hulk. Unless it's the She-Hulk. Then, I'll probably have to google it.
God, I hate my grandmother's dial-up connection. Soooo slooow. I'll post on my blog tomorrow by the way.

Ello said...

hm...squirt all of the cleaning liquid stuff out of the crack in the door, so a puddle of cleaning stuff appears in front of the door, and makes the room smell bad. the people should see the stuff. if they dont, they are po's. thats my amazing answer.

Ello said...

but i hardly know what a smurf is anyway