Friday, February 24, 2006

Why I'm Going to Die

This is a list of why I'm going to die earlier than any of you...
  1. I don't believe in god, so he'll smite me.
  2. The sink just spit at me. I know this isn't a reason but it can't be good.
  3. I'm a horrible person.
  4. I eat crap.
  5. I don't exercise.
  6. Well, I do exercise. I run on the treadmill. But it seems like it would fit there.
  7. My house is chock full o' radon (8.9 PiCo/l. I think that's the unit of measurement)
  8. I've never fowarded a chain letter in my life, so the collective bad luck will kill me.
  9. Um... that's it.
That wasn't really that funny, I guess.

Oh, and for the record, I'm not depressed. I think it's pretty funny, in fact. Don't comfort me. AND DON'T CELEBRATE IF YOU'RE THE FIRST COMMENTER! No one cares.

Here is a list of my pet peeves...

  1. The cell phone "Blackberry"
  2. People who don't like Google
  3. Gideon's People
  4. CHAIN LETTERS!
  5. MySpace
  6. Products that advertise twice in a row on TV but different ads
  7. Products that show the same ad twice in one show
  8. Those "1+1" inserts in Maximum PC
  9. Teachers that I have to say "7, 7, 7"
  10. People that ask questions so that you'll answer and then ask them
  11. People that ask too many questions of the teacher during math tests
  12. Math tests
  13. Homework
  14. People that walk both slow and in a line when I'm trying to get to Spanish. It's like I'm in a time warp, people!
  15. People who pretend that nerds are cool to make themselves funny
  16. People who argue stupidly to annoy you
  17. People who go "blah" every time you talk to interrupt you
  18. People in general


Uh... that's it for now.

Oh, you people have to read Carissa's comment on the last post. Basically it says I'm lucky she doesn't beat me up if I tried to kiss her. And she made fun of my size. Geez, that's rough.

And Hong will have to explain her view on Middle School relationships.

*Edit* Wait, why is it scary that I am your best guy friend. And the idea of the question is that your best guy friend comes and kisses you, so, for the two questions: I would kiss you because that is what the question asked, and: You didn't think about who would be your best guy friend? Isn't that the idea of the question?

And Hong does not give me a complex of any sort. Ha! Well, really I'm just too lazy to type inferiority, which I just did.

25 comments:

Anonymous said...

There are people who, if they wrote a list of why they're going to die, I would get very worried about. You are not one of them.
Oh, here's an idea: What if your best guy friend kissed you on the cheek? Just a thought.
Meep.

Anonymous said...

everyone likes Mike Tozzi? is that a joke?

Anonymous said...

i think someone has a little crush on mike tozi...

Anonymous said...

Yeah. Everyone does like Mike Tozzi. Except (directed at melissa's comment) Sam.

Anonymous said...

I predict this post will cause you some problems.

Anonymous said...

I think that's the infamous ECB ^^^

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

i don't go on the internet much anymore. but no one seems to care. and no one listens to me either. or love me anymore. somebody care!!!

Anonymous said...

i meant un missed

Abby said...

I hate myspace with a passion. I don't actually have a reason for it, I just do.

I think that there are two kinds of popular: there's the kate/ethan (i actually hand to look that guy's name up, cuz I couldn't remember what it was) from lizzy mcguire kind of popular, and then there are people who are literally popular, like they're just best friends with everybody (I can't figure out how they do it, but these people are usually really nice, so I don't think they deserve the scorn most popular people get).

Abby said...

when you die (which WILL NOT be earlier than the rest of us, whatever-the-existing-deity's-name-is forbid), sam, it wont be for being a horrible person, which you know isn't true and we know isn't true, so stop saying it is.

Anonymous said...

dON'T GdET dISTRACTED bY THIS gIBBERISH...tHERE iS dANGER iN tHE wORLD wHERE nONE mIGHT sUSPECT...

rEAD tHIS iMMEDIATELY aND sEE fOR yOUR sELF...

dANGER!!!

Anonymous said...

hERE'S THE dANGEROUS lINK:

http://www.eskimo.com/~spban/bread.html

Anonymous said...

I read the link above and this would make an excellent LOTW!

Anonymous said...

YOU DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD??? THAT'S HORRIBLE!!! CONVERT TO CHRISTIANITY!

Anonymous said...

my view of middle school relationships:
VERY VERY STUPID

Anonymous said...

and you do realize you contradicted yourself by saying you don't believin in God (you say He doesn't exist) and then saying that this "nonexistent" being will smite you.

you can't believe something nonexistent will do something

Anonymous said...

STILL NO ONE LOVE /MISSES/ CARES ABOUT ME!!!!! JACKSON DOES!!!!

Abby said...

you know, people are capable of having perfectly good sets of morals without believing in god.

Abby said...

so I see absolutely nothing horrible about it

Anonymous said...

lalalalala....

god is cool. i couldn't live without him.

but nerds ARE cool.. in my opinion anyway.... and ur list of pet peeves is reallly good....

well.... u made fun of ur size first! and i took the question hypothetically because i didn't remember that i HAD any REAL guy friends. (Matt Schaff might be my other only guy friend.... idk)... and yeah.

Mike tozzi annoys me... argh... science class............ he was POKING me yesterday... and "asking me questions" about my math hw that i was doing b/c i finished all the work we had to do the day b4 and therefore had 35 minutes to kill.. i have yet to decide if he was mocking me or not... gah. i hate my science class.

Anonymous said...

Random fact: You can be an aethiest and be Jewish at the same time. It's true.

Anonymous said...

he or she is right, you know...

if there is a god he will smite sam...

Leah said...

God won't smite you for not believing in him. He gave you intelligence and free will and he probably wants you to use it. Besides I don't think the Jewish God smites anyone except cities. I only think he'd do it if you were like Genghis Sam or something. If people in general annoy you, does that mean you annoy yourself?

Frances said...

. . .?
That was special.
~Frances
P.S. I read Jen's comment, and so did Melissa C. who's here right now. We burst out laughing. Good point, Jen!