Saturday, June 24, 2006

Envelope, please

Yes that's right. The winner of my contest, the "contest" contest, is...

Envelope, please...

Abby! Congratulations to Abby for winning. Her contest involves me giving you an odd problem and you solving it. So, as LOTW was on a Saturday, this is on a Saturday. I don't know what your prize is yet, but I'll think of one.

Problem #1: You are walking along the beach with your dog when you see a paparazzi taking pictures of you. The flash blinds you, and you stumble and fall. Immediately to are set upon by an army of crabs. Your objective is twofold:
  1. Escape from the crabs
  2. Get the film from the paparazzi

The beach has no rocks on it, but sand is something you can use. You are wearing a bathing suit and a white cotton shirt as well as flip-flops. You have 90 cents in change in your pocket as well as a plastic bag. You also have your dog who is also being attacked by crabs.

Good luck.

14 comments:

Ali said...

put the change in the plastic bag and beat off the crabs. then take a crab, throw it at the paparazzi, and while the paparazzi is in pain because of the rabid crab on his face, take the film out of the camera and run.

Anonymous said...

since you "saw" the paparazzi, the person's probably somewhat far away and hiding. To get him out, scream, "HELP I'M BEING EATEN ALIVE BY CRABS!!!" or something else dramatic. The paparazzi should see this as an excellent opportunity for a great, up-close picture. once the paparazzi has helped you escape the crabs,you ask to see his/her camera. If s/he declines, get the dog to chase after. Grab his camera and take out the film. Leave him 90 cents and a flip flop to show your gratitude.

Anonymous said...

CONGRATS ABBY!!! So what's cracking down there in LEWES!!!!!????? And what beed my role please for da musica-al dat u slash we beed producin'?????!!!!!???!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!????

Anonymous said...

to answer jon's question, here's what's happening in lewes: beach with Sophie, town (antique show), striper bites (lunch today), someone (you guess who) swam in the bay, blueberries, peaches, NO PIE, hamburgers on the grill, 750 piece puzzle, yard sale (bean bag tic tac toe and cribbage kit)rain (now), litter of kittens underneath neighbors shed (someone, you guess who, wants to take them all home and adopt them); tennis with someone (you guess who) complaining and more things than one should reasonably be able to cram into one 42 hour weekend, including missing a certain visitor (you guess who)

Anonymous said...

i like hong's...
i'm too uncreative to think up a solution myself.

Abby said...

Put the change (which hopefully is in terms of pennies or nickles or some other coin of little value) in the plastic bag, and come close enough to the paparazzi that you can throw the coin-laden end of the bag around the lense of the camera. Yank the camera away with the end of the bag that is in your hand. Or, if it's easier, just grab the camera with your hands.

Once you've gotten the camera away from the paparazzi, throw sand in his/her eyes to keep him/her out of the way while you work,open the capsul where the film is stored, and take the film out.

To deal with the crabs, pick up your dog, pull the crabs out of its fur, and run.

Abby said...

no, wait, I change my answer:

You put the plasting bag over the camera lense, unil you get the whole bag around the camera and pull it away from the paparazzi.

and thanks, jon :-)

Anonymous said...

sounds like a problem on Maguver

Anonymous said...

CRIBBAGE!!!!!!!!!!! NO PIE??!??!?!?!??!?!!!!???????? WHAT????!?!?!??!!!?? HOW CAN YOU HAVE NO PIE????????!!!!??!?!?!??? and yea waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa- aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa-
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too much stuff to do in 42 hours.

Leah said...

Ok, um... Put the change in the bag and use it to beat off the crabs from your dog. While holding him, cover the crabs with your shirt to keep them occupied. Then, run like heck. Honestly, beating up some paparazzi would probably be worse for your reputation than a picture of you and your dog.

Anonymous said...

Easy. Throw your shoes at the paparazzi. If you miss, (you need to hit him) throw your money at him. Once you hit him, he should stumble long enough for you to whack him on the head so that he lets go of the camera. If he somehow is able to avoid being hit altogether, run ahead of him, throw some sand in his eye, and then whack him on the head and take his camera. Put the camera in the plastic bag and smash the crabs with the camera. This should not only get rid of the crabs but also destroy the camera so that the film is useless. If it doesn't, rip out the film and use it to tie up the paparazzi to feed to the armada of crabs. See? Not that hard!

Molly said...

give the paparazzi the middle finger and throw crabs at them then when the ordeal is over give your dog a hug and pick up what happened when he was attacked by crabs...

Ali said...

sam must update...

Anonymous said...

hey- is Jon the dude that was at your house on Monday?