Saturday, June 26, 2010

Why Would You Tell Me That

One in twenty games I don't feel hungry afterwards. Nearly all of the time I come off the field demanding burgers and pizza and fishsticks with custard, but after five percent of matches, just five percent, my friends and teammates go out for Wendy's; I go home and catch up on my webcomics. I take a shower. I read a book. I think about how I played.

And then right when I am about to go to bed - in fact, right when I am about to brush my teeth - I get hungrier than I've ever been, and for cereal, cereal, cereal. I pull on sweatpants and go downstairs to lay waste to the cabinet next to the sink. I've eaten whole boxes of Multigrain Cheerios and Raisin Bran. I drink water - room-temperature, in a glass - and I eat more cereal than I ever could in a week of usual breakfasts.

And here is my question: why do I want you to know that? Why am I interested in telling my friends that sometimes I like eating cereal late at night? What possesses me to tell people the water's temperature? This is a boring story. This is a then-I-found-five-dollars story. This is unworthy of recounting.

At night, I could shuffle my day's anecdotes into those worth telling and those that should not be repeated. It could never be an exact science - if I have a forgiving audience I might tell one of the less interesting ones - but it is a procedure that I like to think could be performed in a fairly accurate manner. If there's anyone out there that does this, please let me know. I'd like to hear how and when you started, if you think that would be an interesting tale to repeat. At the very least I could take a look at your filing system.

7 comments:

Tim said...

I'm normally against meta-referential stories, but I really enjoyed reading that.

I also really want to try fish fingers with custard.

Anonymous said...

I've done that before, only my target is usually whatever's in the cabinet. Actually happens a lot.

But I don't think I wanna try fish sticks with custard. Don't get me wrong, I like Doctor Who, but not that much.

Anonymous said...

i think it's like eating french fries with a milk shake.

Anonymous said...

cereal's good. no cooking

Carissa said...

FISH FINGERS WITH CUSTARDDDD!

Anonymous said...

I was just about to leave a comment, but the siren call of cereal is too strong. Cheerios for me, buddy!

Anonymous said...

I do the cereal thing too, almost all the time after my games - for whatever reason, honey nut cheerios taste better at night than in the morning, or maybe just because after exercising I can better appreciate the sweet crunch enough to fill up the bowl three times :)